Questions for: A Complicated Kindness

By Miriam Toews

  1. What were your initial impressions of Nomi as a narrator? Did your opinion of her change over the course of the novel?
  2. What emotions did the ending leave you with?
  3. What aspects of the story surprised you the most?
  4. How would you describe Nomi's relationship with her father? How does it evolve?
  5. Which secondary character did you find most compelling, and why?
  6. How do the absences of Nomi's mother and sister shape the story, even though they are physically missing?
  7. Did you sympathize with Raymond Toews? Why or why not?
  8. What does the novel suggest about freedom and belonging?
  9. How does the community influence the choices available to its members?
  10. What role does grief play in shaping the characters' actions?
  11. How does the novel explore the tension between faith and individuality?
  12. What does "kindness" mean in the context of the title?
  13. How does the small-town Mennonite setting shape the story? Could the novel have worked in a different setting?
  14. Did the community feel protective, oppressive, or both?
  15. How did you respond to the nonlinear storytelling?
  16. Nomi often uses humor alongside painful experiences. How did that affect your reading experience?
  17. What responsibilities do parents have when their beliefs conflict with their children's needs?
  18. Is leaving home portrayed as liberation, loss, or both?
  19. Which character changed your perspective the most?
  20. What do you think happens to Nomi after the novel ends?
  21. If you could ask Miriam Toews one question about the book, what would it be?
  22. Did the novel challenge any assumptions you had about faith, family, or community?
  23. Would you recommend this book to others? What kind of reader do you think would appreciate it most?